I know I’ve been a lazy blogger but the last two weeks have literally been a blur. After digging my car out of the remnants of Snowpocalypse 2010, I drove down a day early to Raleigh to make sure I didn’t miss my Bill Maher shows. On the Sunday morning after the special aired I drove from Raleigh to Altoona, PA for a Valentine’s Day show. Then on the 15th I woke up at the buttcrack of dawn and drove from Altoona to Baltimore so I could catch a flight to San Antonio. I was there for one night and the next morning had to fly to Atlanta.
Which brings me to the reason for this post. I overslept and missed my first flight into ATL and had to take a later flight. Then when I finally got into the ATL airport, the airtrain that takes you to the rental car facility was broken and I and about a hundred plus other people had to wait nearly 50 minutes to get to the facility.
All I wanted to do was get to a bed and I didn’t know if I was gonna even be able to stand on my feet any longer. But then I saw this:
The most awesome pair of Maurice Malone overalls ever stitched.
And my day was immediately brightened. These jeans gave me energy. Where did he find them? Or better yet, what made him keep them so long? And how does he access the goodies he puts in the pouch? Getting undressed to get to your cell phone seems a little inconvenient… I wondered (almost aloud — I was kinda delirious ;) whether the pouch on the back was considered an additional carry-on. ‘Cause somehow it doesn’t seem fair that he should be allowed that AND a laptop bag. I thought I would share so these jeans could brighten your day too.
Ok, so I’ve been getting a little excited lately with the video blogging, I know. But they’re fun (for me at least ;) Check out what happened after I got to where I was going in the blog below. The students at Juniata had fun freaking me out. And I starred in my own mini-version of The Blair Witch Project (emphasis on the ‘mini’)
On my way to Juniata College in PA for a show and I got turned around just outside of Amish country. My GPS took me through a cemetary by mistake. Just passed a sign for ‘Fourth Street.’ And I think it might just be the fourth street.
Ever made.
My new favorite street sign.
They weren’t kidding…
I had to drive a 25-mile stretch where the speed limit was about 35 and I kept getting stuck behind horse-drawn carriages. I don’t wanna poke fun at anyone’s culture, but being Amish requires a level of dedication I just don’t possess. I respect it. I just don’t got it.
Hey y’all! Just got back home from my trip to Rhode Island where I performed at the Catch A Rising Star Comedy Club in Providence. And thought I’d put together a little video recap of the horror story that was my hotel stay.
I can summarize this video in two words — “F” hockey!
Hotel clerk: May I have your street address? Me: 3— S Street. Hotel Clerk: Can you spell that? Me: Sure. “S.”
Tee hee ;) It’s the little things that make me happy.
On Friday I had my very own ‘who gon’ check me boo’ moment. I was seriously sitting in my hotel room thinking: “What ever happened to customer service?…”
Why? Check out the Facebook status below for the short version:
click image to see all the status comments
Here’s the thing: I know it was a small thing to be upset about, but my anger was borne out of the extremely poor customer service — not the fact that I didn’t have any batteries. My feet work. I could (and did) change the channel manually. But I could tell that this guy had just decided he didn’t want to help me. Because he was an asshole. And that pissed me off. This douche told me that he couldn’t swap my remote control out because if they filled the rooms that were currently unoccupied, then when those people came they wouldn’t have batteries.
WTD?!?!?!? I’M HERE NOW! What the hell do I care whether people who may or may not decide to come to your hotel have a working remote control if and when they arrive? Why aren’t you equally concerned with a customer who’s already in your establishment? Send someone up the street to the CVS and buy some. At least pretend that you’re trying to accommodate me.
I called and went out to the front desk a total of 4 times. I couldn’t believe I was even having this conversation, but I wasn’t willing to let it go. On the way to the show that nite, I told the adviser at the school that I was playing that evening what happened so he’d know how his money was being spent…
He apologized, promised he’d call them about it, and gave me some batteries to take back to the hotel.
Last Thursday I was in the Charlotte airport and this guy — THIS GUY — was riding the moving sidewalks facing backwards, essentially staring me dead in my face. It was the spookiest thing ever. We got off one sidewalk and he turned forward to walk to the next one. But when he got on the next one, he turned right back around and looked at me… So I took my camera out and took a photo of him just as blatantly as he was staring at me.
You may be wondering what he did next… Well I’ll tell you what he DIDN’T do — and that was turn around. Weirdest sh!t ever. I hated this guy. And so I wanted to share him with y’all. ;)
The lady on the right was doing an ‘impression’ of my eyes. But I let it slide because she made me feel like a rock star when she handed me that Sharpie. ;)
I saw this scene when I pulled off the Jersey Pike to nap at a rest area last nite…
There’s something about a hearse that has be to towed that’s a little ironic. And a little sad. But also, damn funny! In a perfect world (or at least my perfect world) this pick-up would have had one of those “My other car is a hearse” bumper stickers or license plate frames:
Alas, it did not… But imagining that it did kept me up and laughing for at least the next 40 minutes. Tee hee ;)
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