Archive for February, 2009
War stories and ‘chichi’ brunch
Feb 26th
My battle buddies: Stacey, Carrie and Regina
I’ve never been to war — hell, I’ve never been in a fist fight, but if I can liken anything to what I imagine war would be like, it’d be the last job I had. I don’t think anyone who worked there enjoyed it. It was just an awful, unhealthy environment.
It was while I was working this job that I finally tried stand-up for the first time. I was miserable for 40 hours a week at work and I was looking for something to help infuse some joy into my personal life. The only bright spot in my days were the friends I made while working there. We were down in the trenches together and we were literally like a support group for each other. We’ve remained friends and still hang out whenever our schedules permit. This weekend we went to brunch at a ‘chichi’ spot in DC to reminisce on old war stories and just catch up in general. I heart these girls. They were my first joke testers. I’d go into their offices and tell them the first [terrible] jokes I ever wrote… They always laughed. And I KNOW I wasn’t funny then.
Silver lining: If I’d not had that crappy job, I may never have appreciated quite how sweet it is to do something you love for a living.
Love you guys!!! Thanks for being such awesome friends ;)
What do I know about being wealthy?
Feb 24th
Absolutely nothing.
Yet tonight I’m going to be a guest on a radio show called “Wealthy Lifestyles/Real Money Radio†with financial expert Deborah Owens on WEAA 88.9 FM in Baltimore, MD. I can only imagine they’re going to use me as an example of what NOT to do with your life if you want to have a wealthy lifestyle. Either that, or they’re gonna ask me to tell jokes to make other poor people feel better ;)
As I’ve accepted my lot in life, I would be fine with either.
If you’re in the Balto. Metro area and have the chance, check me out tonite from 7-8. I hope the host doesn’t pull a Barbara Walters and try and make me cry. With the week I’ve been having it wouldn’t take much. Tune in if you can!
Nacho Therapy
Feb 23rd
Having a really bad day. So I turned to the best therapist I know. On my way to Giant for the Haagen Dazs lemon sorbet… Eat two quarts and call me in the morning ;)
Exhale.
NACA, Please — a photo essay
Feb 17th
Yay! So I just got home from the National Convention for the National Association for Campus Activities (NACA) in Nashville, TN. It was held at the convention center in the Opryland Hotel so that’s where we stayed. It’s HUGE and gorgeous… Easy to forget you’re actually inside.
One of the many walkways where I got lost this weekend...
The waterfalls -- inside the hotel
The whole deal with the entertainment portion of the NACA convention is that campus activity boards and their advisors from colleges all across the country come and watch bands, poets, comics, motivational speakers showcase and then they choose which acts they want to come and perform at their schools. There are several regional conventions in addition to the National. I was selected to perform as an individual showcase and I’m part of the NBC Diversity package as well. College dates are how a lot of comics fill their calendars — and pay their bills. So I was super grateful to be invited. It’s pretty competitive.
The Sophie K. booth
The "K" team -- Meg, my agent Kate, and Bridget
This is the booth for my college agency, Sophie K. Entertainment. After our performances, we come back to the booth to meet the students and [hopefully] contract show dates.
I didn't say it...
This is me and Michelle Buteau. Hilarious comic, super cool lady. Check her out… Michelle is a NACA pro. I was trying to learn the game thru osmosis… More >
More V-Day love from WaPo
Feb 13th
The Post Express showed me even more love today with another plug of my Valentine’s Day shows in the Weekend Top Stops section. As you can see, I was No. 3 ;)  Both shows are sold out but they don’t know that. I just appreciate their support. It’s nice to feel the love at home!!!
WaPo… will you be my Valentine??!?
I’mma be on TV, Jazmine Sullivan, and is this shirt the devil?
Feb 13th
Sorry in advance for the epic. Eat some now, save some for later…
So, I went up to NY yesterday for what I guess you would call a ‘commercial shoot.’ It was a project for TBS where instead of having their corporate advertisers run 30-second commercials, they ask comics to write bits around the products and perform them in comedy club settings. I guess it’s a more subliminal type of advertising and the spots air primarily during the weeknight comedy block. Not sure if I did a good job of explaining this, so here’s one that cutie patootie Jeff Dye did last go-round:
That make sense? So our companies were Pop Tarts, Cici’s Pizza and I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter. It was a challenge to write jokes that portray all these products in a completely positive light because my instinct as a comic is to poke fun at things, point out what’s bad or dumb about them…Â Strangely, that doesn’t seem to work when you’re writing ads for a product. Imagine that. ;)
We shot in Brooklyn and I headed right back to DC as soon as I wrapped the shoot. I hate driving on bridges but in order to get home I had to drive the Verrazano and the Goethals. I was OK on the Verrazano…
Wide lanes, I didn't feel constricted...
But that damn Goethals Bridge… OMG!!! It was smooth sailing leaving Brooklyn and all the way down the Jersey Pike, but as I’m merging onto 95 South after crossing the Delaware Memorial I hear a loud CRACK! I can tell whatever it was happened to my car, but I had no idea what it was. As I slowed down I heard a crunching sound and thought that I had run over a bottle or something. But my tires seemed to be OK… I had to cross 4 lanes of traffic to get to the shoulder and when I finally parked the car and turned around I realized that my rear driver’s side window was completely blown out. That crunching sound was the glass falling out onto the highway. More >
I want to be this funny
Feb 9th
“I’ve got a nautical theme pashmina afghan.” — by far my favorite line.
Followed closely by:
“I’m on a dolphin/Doin’ flips and s—.”
“F— trees, I climb bouys mother——.”
“Poseidon, look at me-eeee.”
Why replace your laptop screen when you could just buy a new computer?
Feb 8th
Oh wait… what’s that? I CAN’T AFFORD to buy a new computer OR replace my laptop screen?
Well that changes everything.
Back in mid-January the backlight went out on my Dell laptop just for no reason. I thought it’d be something cheap to repair. Replace a bulb or something simple… But it turns out I’ll have to replace the entire screen because it’s all one piece. Damn technology. I think I can get a new one for about $250… But for just $700 I could by one of the HP Vivienne Tam Digital Clutches. They’re super cute and only as big as my joke notebook. I know I can’t afford it, but I want one. (Yes I know the logic of spending an extra $450 for a new computer sounds dumb… but that’s because you haven’t SEEN it yet.
LUST, GREED, ENVY... I've used up 3 deadly sins on just this one tiny computer
See? I was over at my girl Dana’s house and she was invited by HP and Vivienne Tam to come to NY Fashion Week and blog about the clutch — all expenses paid PLUS they gave her the clutch and I fell in love.
Now, look how cute we look together!
Now clearly, I’m not going to be able to buy this clutch, but I think they have them at a much more affordable price without the designer element… I could do a basic black or purple or yellow… and of course by “I could do” I mean, “I would accept as a gift for my 30-ONE-derful…”
Exhale. A girl can dream, right? One of these days… Enjoy the Grammy’s. SO much to blog about.
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