Archive for September, 2008
OK, OK…
Sep 29th
I posted a short clip of my performance on Ellen. It’s to the right in the menu bar.
Enjoy!
And you’re welcome. ;)
Join my street team
Sep 29th
I suck at dating.
I do. I’ve never really been big on trying to sell myself to another person. I guess I’ve always thought, hey I’m pretty cool. If you agree, lets go bowling. That’s a good date in my book. I’m not picky I promise.
I’ve been on some really bad dates… And I’ve been on some decent ones, but overall I think I’m just over it. I’m tired and I don’t really have the energy to sift thru all the men out there to find the right one for me.
When I was in college, there was a local club promoter who used to pay me and a couple of my friends $20 a nite to pass out party flyers to promote his events. We wore matching t-shirts and would stand outside clubs and give out flyers to people that were leaving. We’d hand them out by the doors, put them on car windshields (yeah that was me ;) And for every person who came to his party and showed a pass with my code on it (they were marked) I would get $2. Great incentive for the ladies on the street team. It saved him time and advertising dollars, and even if 20 people showed up with my flyers he was only out like $60 total which was like a gold mine to me at the time.
I’ve been thinking recently that what I need is a street team for my personal life. Just pay a bunch of good-looking guys to do the work for me — wear Erin Jackson t-shirts, pass out flyers and tell other guys what a catch I am. On the front of the flyers there would be a (very flattering) photo of me in a (very) low-cut top, and on the back there would be a list of some of my best qualities, such as:
- makes a mean lasagna and bakes cakes from scratch (this shows I’m domestic)
- owns her own home (this shows I’m responsible)
- drives a beat-up Corolla with only 3 hubcaps (this shows I’m not materialistic)
- loves sports and Jack Daniel’s (this shows I’m cool)
- has a huge music collection and will allow you to download from her iTunes (this shows I’m not selfish)
And I’d tell my boys… You see a nice car? Put a flyer on the windshield. Maybe it’s a man’s car, maybe it’s not. At this point, who can afford to be picky? I’m not sure what the incentive would be for street team members whose flyers return a successful date, but I’d make it worth their while. Maybe I’d go on a date with them. Who knows?
All I know is that I can’t do this alone.
Will you join my street team? I’m having an interest meeting next Friday.
PHI 20, CHI 24
Sep 29th
This is not what I needed after the day I had yesterday. AND Dallas lost… We could have evened things up.
Exhale.
Record: 2-2
The Brotha with the banjo
Sep 28th
Not quite as artistic as Henry O. Tanner’s “The Banjo Lesson”…
But it’s way funnier ;)
This is me and very good friend/godsend/all-around-amazing guy Odyssey Michaels in the green room at the Richmond Funnybone. Don’t ask for an explanation. I was there and I don’t have one. Suffice it to say, he actually does play the banjo.
You’re welcome.
Dollar Tree Pregnancy Tests
Sep 28th
Yes?
No?
Guess I’ll just wait and see…
Photo Moral #1: If you give a damn, how ’bout you spend more than a dollar on your pregnancy test.
Photo Moral #2: If you don’t have enough money for a legit pregnancy test, you should probably be hoping for a “not pregnant†result.
Compromise vs. Acceptance
Sep 23rd
I recently came across this quote by Chinua Achebe:
One of the truest tests of integrity is its blunt refusal to be compromised.
And it really spoke to me. I’ve been struggling a lot lately with the direction I want to take my act in — not because I’m uncomfortable with my material or persona, but because my father has a huge problem with it.
I said the word “bitch” on Comedy Central. I think it’s the second bit in the clip below:
| Jokes.com | ||||
| Erin Jackson – Marrying Into Comedy | ||||
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After the show aired my father reamed me for cussing on TV. I told him that you can say “bitch” on the networks. But he wasn’t trying to hear me.
I see comedy nite in and nite out — all kinds of comics with varying styles. And I know that by comedy club/booker standards, I am not a dirty act. I say “bitch” in my act. I occasionally say “shit”. And when I’m referring to this particular incident (which is only of late) I use the “mother” of all cuss words. But only because I’m repeating something I overheard someone else say. And I believe there’s a bigger point to it.
I grew up in a pretty religious household. Nothing fanatical. But my dad was superintendent of the Sunday School and a deacon at our church. So yeah I was at church every Sunday, but my folks weren’t strict and I was always a good girl. But I haven’t gone to church on even a semi-regular basis since I left home to come to DC for college. I honestly felt awful about it in the beginning — I remember the first Sunday I didn’t go to church I felt like there was this big gaping whole in my world. But that feeling began to fade the more and more I slept in. Of course I still believe in God. And with all the blessings I’ve received just these last 6 months in both my professional and personal life, I KNOW I need to be back in church. I joined one about a year ago and I even have a new bit about my trip to church this summer. But I’m out of the habit. And now after a late show on Saturday, its way hard for me to get up and go.
All that to say that while I believe in and thank my parents and extended family for the Christian principles upon which I was raised, I am my own person. And I don’t think it makes me a bad person if I say “bitch” on stage. But my dad is worried that all his friends and former colleagues who see me will be offended by what I say and it’ll reflect poorly upon him.
Exhale. More >
Cool new blog: This Week in Blackness
Sep 22nd
So some of my NYC buds (Elon James White, Baron Vaughn and Reese Waters) started a new blog called This Week in Blackness. So hilarious. They haven’t been up for long, but there are some really funny features on there. My favorite is “IS THIS RACIST – with Baron Vaughn” — a must read for sure ;) Check it out and submit some of your own questions. It’s all in fun and I am willing to guarantee that you will holler at the response he posts. I heart Baron. Such a funny brotha.
Support their site! But then come back here ;) No defecting allowed! tee hee ;)
E
PHI 15, PIT 6
Sep 21st
YAY! Defense looked amazing. Dude, 7 sacks, a beautiful pick by Samuel… and I guess Brian Dawkins had something to prove to the haters who keep saying he’s too old… I couldn’t be happier. Well, I guess I’d be happier if the Giants, Redskins AND Cowboys lost, but we can only do what we can do ;) The only troubling thing is how close the game was despite all that. But a win is a win. GO EAGLES!!!
Get better B. West!
Record: 2-1
From the Blog to the Stage: Context Clue-less
Sep 20th
Hey! So I’ve come to realize that blogging has really helped my writing. Sometimes when I’m struggling to come up with new ideas and I’ve got writer’s block, I’ll scroll back thru old blogs and find stories and premises that transfer nicely onto the stage.
Last month I blogged about my friend who doesn’t know what Au Pair means. And I’ve taken that story to the stage a few times since. Last nite it got the biggest laugh its gotten so far and I wanted to share it here. Perhaps this will be a new series here on You’re Welcome… hahaha … and like most of the series I begin, I’ll only do it once ;) Anywayz here goes… I Youtubed the clip. Lemme know what you think? Is it a keeper? You get to decide. My act is in your hands.
Your two cents