Archive for March, 2008
Sportsies
Mar 29th
Can somebody please tell Hillary Clinton she’s acting like the bloodied, puffy-faced boxer who throws his hands up in victory at the end of a fight even though everyone watching can see that he’s lost? Dude… quit it. You so aren’t winning. I’m sure you’re expecting some more analogies here… another sardonic observation to maybe back up that premise. Well, tough. I’m tired. I just felt bad because I haven’t posted in a while.
It’s been a long time, I shouldn’t have left you
Without a strong rhyme to step to
Think of how many weak shows you slept through
Time’s up, I’m sorry I kept you…
You’re Welcome.
I’ve had a bunch of random thoughts recently that I hope to turn into bits. One is about how I always wanted to try being a sportscaster… but I don’t have any of the prerequisites… Hilarious right? Yeah I know. I heart Bob Costas. Really. I know a lot of people are annoyed by him, but it’s just because he knows everything about everything and they’re intimidated. I, however, am not. Cause I recognize he’s supernatural. No one’s talking in his earpiece. He has every one of those facts filed away in his head. He’s like Rain Man for sports. Give dude a cape and some tights and he’d be…Â Fill in your own blank, I’m too tired for this ish… Huh?!?!?
Good nite
Who Says Women Aren’t Funny?
Mar 17th
photo courtesy of Vanity Fair
…is the title of an article in the April issue of Vanity Fair. It’s a retort of sorts to Christopher Hitchens’ 2007 article entitled “Why Women Aren’t Funny”–which I blogged about last winter. Take some time out and read the entire article(s) for yourself… but in the meantime, I’ve posted some of the quotes I found most interesting below:
“Women either had to compete—head-on, in the aggressive style of Paula Poundstone or Lisa Lampanelli—or subvert the form and make themselves offbeat and likable, the way that Whoopi Goldberg and Ellen DeGeneres do. As Elaine May used to say regarding improv, “When in doubt, seduce.†By and large, however, stand-up comedy is tougher and meaner, and the women who do it play by men’s rules.”
“It used to be that women were not funny. Then they couldn’t be funny if they were pretty. Now a female comedian has to be pretty—even sexy—to get a laugh.”
“It has become a supply-and-demand issue: the supply of good-looking female comedians is growing, and the industry demands that they keep growing prettier. Chelsea Handler, the host of Chelsea Lately, a talk show on E!, has long legs, short skirts, low-cut shirts, and puffy blond hair—her look is Beverly Hills bimbo, with a Borscht Belt mouth.”
Interesting.
While this new article is initially positioned as a rebuttal to Hitchens’ widely criticized claims–1) that women aren’t as funny as men because human nature and society don’t require us to be, and 2) that those who are funny are all overweight, gay, unattractive or Jewish (WHAT?)–it falls waaaay short. In fact, it does little to nothing to address the first point and then somehow morphs into an article about how attractive you now have to be in order to be a successful female comedian.
Huh?
The author cites Tina Fey’s career as an actor, writer, director and producer as evidence that today’s female comedian can stand toe to toe with her male counterparts. But then by focusing on how attractive she is–or how unattractive she isn’t, I feel like the author is almost discounting her success. Did Tina Fey’s looks help her get the job of head writer of SNL? How the heck should I know? (Note: by her own admission, Fey doesn’t consider herself as ‘a looker’) But I do know that she couldn’t have kept the job, written a hit movie, and created 30 Rock if she didn’t have a brilliant comedic gift. That’s what we should be talking about.
I feel like I was duped by Vanity Fair. Am I missing the part of the article where I’m supposed to feel empowered–spoken up for? Or was that even the point? I may have disagreed with Hitchens but in my opinion, he wins this battle because in certain parts of the ‘rebuttal’ article it seems like the author is agreeing with him… or at least just not disagreeing enough. Pretty photos? Yes. But this is no rebuttal.Â
Thoughts…?
Country clubbers don’t get ‘poor’ jokes and the basketball players didn’t have dads
Mar 15th
Pt. I
Yeah, so I was in Jackson, Michigan over the weekend–not to be confused with Jackson, Mississippi. At all. Ever. Jackson, Michigan is the birthplace of the Republican Party… and the birthplace of Tony Dungy. Right… Anyway, I was performing at a country club, which turned out to be a pretty sweet gig. The audience was cool — nice mix of young rich people and old rich people. But they were all rich. Or rich as far as I’m concerned. Haha… I was doing a bit where I talk about looking at my checking account balance online and seeing parentheses around the number and initially thinking, “Oh how cute, they put a smiley face by my account balance!” and then realizing that it meant I was in the negative… And when I hit the punch I got nothing. Not so much as a chuckle. Until I explained the joke. “See parentheses mean you’re poor. You’ve heard of poor, right?”
Comedy Rule #1: Know your audience.
Good Game?
Mar 13th
OK… so my friend Keisha and I went out to this bar/lounge last nite for the launch of this new Wednesday nite hot spot (hopefully) in downtown D.C. My friend Ra helped to promote it and I hadn’t been out in D.C. for a while, so I told him sure I’ll come.
While we were there I ran into a girl I’m friendly with and know socially–she seems like a very cool girl, but we’ve never actually hung out. Keisha and I were at the bar batting our eyelashes in hopes that men would buy us drinks–like any self-respecting women would do–and we were talking with this young lady. Anyway… to make a long story short, it was a Wednesday nite so I didn’t feel like staying out too late and the three of us all decided to leave at the same time. But as we were walking out of the door and saying our good nites, she slapped me on the butt.
?
I was so shocked I just kept walking and didn’t tell Keish til we got down the block what had happened. Is that what’s poppin’ in the streets, now? Ladies, are we just going around slapping each other on the butts like we just won the pennant?
I know she and I have had conversations about guys in the past, so I know she’s not gay. Maybe she thought I’d be cool with that. Maybe that’s how she and her friends say “Peace.” Or maybe… maybe… maybe?
Whatever the reason I was uncomfortable all the way home wondering if I should have addressed it, so that it wouldn’t be awkward the next time we see each other, or wondering whether other people saw the little exchange and my non-response led her and/or them to believe I was OK with it… I dunno. Weird-o nite indeed.
Damn, Disney…
Mar 13th
OK, I know I’m gonna get some comments from you parents out there about how this isn’t new… yada, yada, yada… but I don’t have kids, so I’m allowed to be a bit behind the curve.Â
Handy Manny? Really? My very pregnant friend Angi is cramming and learning about all things baby in preparation for her new bundle and she brought this cartoon to my attention. I realize my tardiness in learning about this show means I’ve probably missed whatever backlash–if any–surrounded this cartoon when it first began. And I’m sure it’s educational and the kids love it because it’s from Disney, but I gotta assume that there were at least a few Latinos who weren’t too happy about a Latino handyman cartoon.
Talk about perpetuating a stereotype. Why aren’t there marches going on right now? I know damn well if Disney or whoever else came up with a young black girl cartoon and named her something like… I dunno Preg Nancy, we’d be marching, well…Â until.
And for dessert…
Mar 8th
An awesome blog by The Amazing Bill Burr (that makes him sound more like a magician than a comedian, but he IS amazing). A must-read if you’re a comic or if you’re not a comic and you’ve ever tried to give a comic advice on their act… suckas…
Enjoy.
http://blog.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendID=11634307&blogID=364024296
Live at Gotham and I almost tripped Ann Coulter at Union Station
Mar 8th
This past Wednesday I went back up to NYC for my Live at Gotham taping. Woo-hoo!!! We had to get in town the day before the taping just to make sure we were there and there were no problems. An extra free nite in a funky little NYC hotel? No complaints outta me. They put us up at the Maritime hotel. See below:
The hotel was in Chelsea and it was really cute. The rooms were a little small, but the space was gorgeous and they really went all the way with the cruise ship theme. Note the windows. I wish I had taken photos of my cabin/room and the shower. Then you’d really see what I meant.
Anyway, on Wednesday nite, the best friend Michelle who works in the city came by the hotel to evaluate outfit choices before we headed out to dinner. She picked the same outfit everyone else (including the wardrobe manager at Comedy Central) did. Of course it was my second choice, but ended up working well in the end. Then we went out to this Thai Restaurant a couple blocks away from the hotel. It was yummy. Good choice us! When were done eating, Mich had to hop the bus back to Hackensack and I had a show to get to.
My management had a benefit show going on that nite at Stand-Up NY, so me and the two other guys from the agency that were taping the show on Thursday –Nate Bargatze and Mike Vecchione — were on the show as a warm-up. Also on the show were Todd Barry, Rich Vos, Kevin Brennan and Jeff Ross. I was almost scared to talk to Jeff because I’ve seen him rip so many people to shreds at roasts, in my head I’m assuming he’s gonna start busting on me as soon as I introduce myself… Of course he didn’t and seemed like a really cool guy. Oh how I love NY. More >












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